The Best of Yahoo Answers

There are few things in life more edifying than perusing Yahoo Answers. However, in this busy modern world, many of us are left without sufficient time for this noble hobby. Lucky for you readers, I copied and pasted some gems below.

Q: “Why do people call their children ‘bubba’?”

A: “Who does that?”

Q: “Someone says I suck at dancing? What do I do? First of all I don’t think I suck. I enter dance battles and have advanced past the prelims many times, and gotten respect from other dancers and they’re really good. When I post a vid of me dancing the same guy always has something to say, he says I dance too fast and I’m sloppy and need to slow it down. However it’s my style and I know many fast dancers who are champions. This guy doesn’t hasn’t even past [sic] the first round or even came to a dance battle. I’m sure I could beat him. Why is he like that and what do I do? It makes me feel mad and makes me feel like a bad dancer.”

A: “keep doing what you’re doing and if you don’t read music, learn”

Q: “Is it normal to be bored in ballet class? I want to be a ballerina but sometimes i get bored or dont want to go to class. is this normal.”

A: “do u have other stuff in your life eg hobbies”

Q: “What are some reasoning for wanting to attend a private school? I am tasked with writing an Essay for a school I m trying to get into. The prompt asks me “Why do you want to attend [Private Highschool]?” I need an icebreaker, someone to help me start this Essay”

A: “you could say theres less crime in a private school” [????]

Q: “Why do all the bullies at my school have to be scorpios? literally EVERY SINGLE BULLY at my school is a scorpio. EVERY SINGLE ONE. What makes them so mean???”

A: “Scorpios are manipulative but I never met one that bullied unless there was a logical reasoning. I’ve been bulled by Leos, Taurus and Pisces more than anyone else”

Q: “Can rabbits be Christians?”

A: “Unlike rabbis who are often Jewish.”

Q: “My kids are getting bullied by vegan kids for having lunch meat in their sandwiches, how do you deal with bully vegans?”

A: “any kind of Bullying must be reported to the headmaster”

Q: “Should we vote for animals?”

A: “That depends on who it is running against.”

Q: “Is instant noodles safe?”

A: [There was no good answer. I am still grappling with this one.]

Q: “Do vibrations harm earthworms? I have a desk that shakes the tiniest bit every time I type or write. I heard earthworms don’t like vibrations, but they are also really resistant. I figure with all the traffic outside, they might be okay…”

A: “sounds like a great science fair project”

Q: “Is my son using drugs? I caught my teenage son smoking marijuana with his friends when I came home from work early today. I overheard one of them saying “weed is nice but ice cream would be better”. I sent them home and discovered that “ice cream” is a slang term for methamphetamines. As one of them was leaving they dropped a sandwich bag with white pills in it. It’s a white oblong pill that reads RP143. I’ve looked in my prescription drug almanac and can’t find anything about it. Please help”

A: “RP143 is Lactase, which helps to digest dairy products, so is harmless. Weed is adefinitely [sic] a drug”

Q: “Does this sound like a good combination for a smoothie? I am thinking about making a smoothie with these ingredients: mango pineapple orange banana coconut coconut Greek yogurt. Do you think that I should use the orange with coconut yogurt? Do you think that both ingredients would be weird together?”

A: “Sure.”

Q: “How can I talk my dad into letting me have a 175 gallon aquarium?”

A: “You want a swimming pool not an aquarium”

A baby crocodile held in the palms of two hands.
This is a baby crocodile. I did not find her on Yahoo Answers. Her name is Veronica. There aren’t many things in life I’m sure of, but this is one of them.



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